Veganism, as it was originally intended to be, is dead.
Maybe it never existed in the first place.

Post-veganism is a reflection about what it means to be a vegan,
now that the word has completely lost its meaning in the dominant culture.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Vegan Dating

I am an outsider when it comes to the world of vegan dating. My four year anniversary with my boyfriend will be this August. We were both omnivores when we met each other. Over time this obviously changed. Although I went vegan first, I never asked my boyfriend to; eventually he realized on his own "it was stupid not to be vegan." Most couples and single people aren't as lucky as I was.

The first vegan I ever met started a vegan/vegetarian club at my university so that she could meet more vegans. She was married to an omnivore and was a bit unhappy about it. She loved her husband, but you could just see it in her face that something was wrong when she talked about eating dinner at her house. Then there was a friend I met through my vegan club that was dating an omnivore. Then of course all of the countless threads you'll see on any vegan forum about "would you date an omnivore?"

So, would you date an omnivore? There are plenty of vegans (myself included) who find the idea absolutely ridiculous. Just look at carlylyn's deviantart account and her print "I Only Kiss Vegans." Consider the artist's statement: "A present for the vegan men out there and a little inspiration for the vegan women. Hold out for a vegan man, girls, and don't settle for anything less. Kissing meat eaters is way gross. " Way gross indeed. I can't look at omnivores or vegetarians without thinking of death. Even petting omnivorous cats makes my skin crawl.

Is there a happy middle ground? What about dating someone who eats vegan when they are with you? Or is this just a new way to pretend someone has values they really don't? I'd say so. The same goes for people who "go vegan" for their significant other. It's basically saying: "Going vegan for the animals who suffer doesn't make sense to me, so I'll go vegan for a nonhuman animal instead." While the end result is that they're vegan - are they really vegan? Or are they only eating a vegan diet? According to Gary Francione one of the most important parts of animal rights is telling other people about veganism. If your significant other can't even go vegan for animals, how can they even talk to anyone else about doing it without being a hypocrite?

Veganism only works if enough people are vegan that a culture that doesn't want to treat animals like property exists. Every time we encourage or accept someone that isn't vegan we're going backwards. The person you date, love and maybe even marry will be your other half. If they don't agree with you, you just don't have the same values. Saying I won't date people who think using animals like property is okay is being strong. It's being vegan. Doing anything else is compromising the movement we dedicate our lives to.

No comments:

Post a Comment